


Staring At The Sun

by athousanderrors



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-05-18
Updated: 2007-05-18
Packaged: 2018-10-05 17:10:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10313093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/athousanderrors/pseuds/athousanderrors
Summary: Putting the past behind him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by ‘Staring At The Sun’ by Rooster. You can watch the video on Youtube [here.](http://youtube.com/watch?v=l58M1kb8-zc) Lyrics at the end of the fic.

Huddled against the wind, the lone figure walked along the Bay, pausing every now and then to look across the unquiet water. He turned his face up towards the sun’s rays, eyes closed, soft smile lighting up his face. His hands curled loosely around the railings as his coat flapped behind him in the wind, snatches of conversation flying past his ears, torn away from their owners by the wind that had driven most people inside.

It felt like years since he had seen daylight, years since he had felt fresh air on his skin. He had been in that place for so long, in the darkness, shivering and lost. Eyes opening as his chin dropped, he looked along the Bay, smiling quietly to himself. Walking quicker now, he broke into a run, lips pulled back in a fierce grin as he felt the wind rushing by, legs burning as his feet pounded the pavement, lungs aching by the time he finally slowed, far away from the Plass.

He leant on another railing, watching as the sun sparkled on the waves, smile fading as he thought of all he had left behind. All that he’d soon forget. Pain, and darkness, yes, but there had been light too. Each of them, bright and alive in their own ways. But being there had smothered him, choked him until he had forgotten how to breathe. They had pushed at him, asked and demanded and taken every inch of him until he’d forgotten who he was, who he had been.

Torchwood was excitement, and adventure, and never knowing if you were going to survive to see the next dawn. He was done with that. He didn’t need that thrill, that stomach-churning terror as they faced whatever the Rift threw at them. Let the others revel in danger and uncertainty. They had taken everything he ever had, and given nothing in return. And he’d never even noticed. Too busy staring up, towards the light. Towards Him.

He hadn’t been allowed to leave, of course. He’d known that the day he had joined. Torchwood didn’t work like that. He wouldn’t be allowed to leave with his memories intact, at least. But when those memories led to nothing but pain, and darkness, and loneliness, he couldn’t help but be glad. They had begged and pleaded, cajoled and threatened, wanting him to stay. _Needing_ him to stay. But they couldn’t compare to what he’d been through. Bound and gagged and beaten, losing everything he had, everything he had been. All he’d had were dreams, and in the end he’d lost even those.

And now he had escaped. Taken the poisoned chalice, as if completely oblivious to what they had done. He had almost wanted to laugh. As if they expected him to try and get out of erasing his past. Erasing the mess and the pain and the darkness. But he was tired of it all. Tired of standing in the shadows, being pushed and pulled and losing it all while his eyes were on Him.

He turned his face up to the light once more, eyes closed, breathing in the salt air. Hearing faint voices growing closer, he turned away, eyes opening as he began to run once more. Away from the Plass, away from Cardiff.

Away from Jack.

THE END.

 

 _Daylight on my shoulder_  
Makes me feel alive  
You kept me standing in your shadow  
And it’s a cold cold place to hide

I’m running away from this messed up place  
I’m breaking free, yeah yeah

I’m tired of staring at the sun  
Can’t stand the way you burn my eyes so I can’t see  
Stealing every breath I breathe  
You push me into overdrive  
And I don’t need this kind of high coz now I’m done  
You took everything while I was staring at the sun

I know you won’t let me  
But just turn and walk away  
You'll tie me up, kick me around  
Trying to kill my dreams and break me down  
But I won’t hang around

I’m running away from this messed up place  
I’m breaking free, yeah yeah

I’m tired of staring at the sun  
Can’t stand the way you burn my eyes so I can’t see  
Stealing every breath I breathe  
You push me into overdrive  
And I don’t need this kind of high coz now I’m done  
You took everything while I was staring at the sun  
I was staring at the sun

Daylight on my shoulder  
I know its time to run  
Yes I know its time to run

I’m tired of staring at the sun  
Can’t stand the way you burn my eyes so I can’t see  
Stealing every breath I breathe (stealing every breath I breathe)  
You push me into overdrive  
And I don’t need this kind of high coz now I’m done  
You took everything while I was staring at the sun  
Yeah, yeah staring at the sun  
You took everything while I was staring at the sun.


End file.
